Magical!

The train chugged and the heavy wheels started moving. Tears brimmed up gradually to the extent of blurring visibility.

The sight of the baby started distancing gradually. Sonali had been through this sinking feeling before and this was yet again. And like always, she had decided to remain rock-solid and emotionally tough enough, to not let that feeling tear her apart and also not let her tears roll down her eyes.

But this time, it was unexpected and different. Unlike previous times, this time she saw a wailing Rohan trying to wriggle out of his grandfather's arms to be in his mother’s arms. It was very different from the times when the separation was painful for the mother but simply an insignificant incident for the cheerful child. Or maybe, everyone wanted to believe that it was not disturbing for the child…….it was very much possible that it mattered as much to him as well although he was simply unable to express it. The answer, no one would never know! Science had not progressed enough to convert a baby’s emotions into our comprehensible format.

'Mummy...!!', he cried out loud. He didn’t know anymore words to express himself. But the feelings were the same on both ends be it the mother’s or father’s or the child’s; that of deep heartache.

Unlike other times, the mother was quiet in her expressions while the child was crying out loud. This made the mother’s emotions give-in to the circumstances. She descended from the slowly moving train and ran forth to snatch the baby from the grandfather's arms.

'He shall stay with me.....I will manage....You need not worry over that.’

Sonali’s father responded immediately by pulling the baby back into his arms, before the train gained speed. Sonali and her husband had no options left, but to quickly board back onto the train. The train picked up speed and in no time, the baby was a distant image. Sonali kept watching till nothing was visible. Both Sonali and her husband realized, whenever they had made attempts to bypass emotions, the latter was always victorious and ruled over their minds. No logic or no pragmatism would prevail then.

As she wiped her tears and her husband comforted her, she looked around. She had already created enough scene at the railway station. There were passengers and cart-loaders watching with a question mark on their face. They were able to fathom the pain of separation from a baby but were unable to understand....Why? There would obviously have been several other questions. Why did she have to let the baby go? Who was the person to whom she had handed over the approx. two-year-old kid? And off course the most intriguing one would have been.......Was it their kid? Both parents sat down. They were too much in pain to bother for anyone’s questioning faces or glares.

Sonali looked out of the window. She recollected how she had woken up at the hospital to see a baby sleeping beside her. He looked charming as he glanced at everyone with his tiny eyes. He also looked lost in this world. Sonali had found a new meaning to her life………………..It was absolutely selfless and caring.

It was late-evening in no time. They simply had their dinner and went off to sleep. The next morning, they were at the arriving-station and they hired a cab back home in haste. They had returned back to another home and unpacked and arranged. Sonali called up their maid while her husband fetched in the groceries. All of this was mechanical and with a heavy heart. The pain had not left them yet.

But they knew it will go somewhere on the back of their minds once their busy office schedule started the very next day. That would completely deviate their minds from this although it did not have the power to heal the hurt.

As they sat for their evening tea, they called up Sonali’s father to get a glimpse of the baby on the phone. The grandfather picked up the phone. The grandmother was too emotional and she too was left sobbing at the station. She was better now and brought the baby before the mobile’s camera for a sight. The baby too was happy. At least he appeared so.

'Why?' was a topic still to understand.

Everyone was delighted with the baby! And with the baby came the happiness and the true meaning to life. Sonali started understanding how any person around any of us steps into the world and gradually develops into being a person that he or she is. Maybe she had started maturing or maybe she was just being a mom! Sometimes, it was even difficult to believe that she was a mother now. It was an experience which no other feeling could be compensated for or even revolved nearly.

Besides the little fun happenings which comes with a new born baby......there were also plenty of learnings. A baby was unaware of the difference between fire and water or height and depth. He didn’t know what was good or bad. They tried to teach him what was dirty or clean and what needed to be eaten while what was to be thrown.

Both of Rohan’s parents started realized that nurturing a baby was like playing with dough.......it was up to them how they moulded it. Or maybe even like a whiteboard, it was up to them what needed to be written on it or how they would chalk out his personality. Obviously, all parents want the best for their child but there are also surroundings, circumstances and happenings. And that was how each one of us was created. Was this a spiritual outlook?

All this delight and fun was short-lived. It came ticking on the date and clock that the maternity leave was coming to an end. And office life would start again. And surprisingly, the professional world had no empathy to such situations despite the fact everyone’s existence was party to this very fact. It was surprising how all believed that the new born baby would be absolutely manageable after a maternity period of six months. And the new mom would be capable handling all at the same time. Does everything come back to normal in both professional and personal life within three or six months? Would a baby grow up enough to take care of himself within three months or for that matter even two years? Sonali was unable to fathom how people didn’t understand or pretended not to understand it.

Very unwillingly, but she had to join back. Everyone in office welcomed her with open arms. That was general office camaraderie. The line was immediately drawn when it came to work. No one would want to comprehend the kind of energy raising a child required. From drowsiness to body weakness to getting back home on time. Funnily, everyone would have experienced it or would know about it, but it seemed difficult to accommodate given the fact that 'self' was a priority everywhere......leave alone the corporate world. And when it came to assisting the other or the self, the latter was a priority for each one of us. The professional world was no different.

It all came raining down on Sonali’s head in no time. From baby diapers to unprepared corporate presentations; from paediatricians to excel sheets; from sleepless nights to drowsy mornings: it was all in chaos in no time. She had her parents for support but given their age, it was also a difficult job for them. And obviously, how long was it possible for them to stay with the couple, leaving their own house locked in the small town. People with parents in the same town as their occupations are blessed! The other lot would have to leave some or the other day.

Sonali had already availed her complete maternity sabbatical and all other saved leaves. Sadly again, one could not leave everything to sit at home. Each one around would have certainly undergone the same situation at some point of time or another. But unfortunately, very few would be willing to comprehend the reason for the gap in your career. It was thought provoking. Leave aside the baby, what if there are ailing parents or even leave aside that, what if the person himself is ill or maybe had met with an accident. How could the professional world assume that lives came without illness or accidents? Why should that rupture the employability chances?

True! Trainings and updates would be required. But that would anyway be required for the existing ongoing employees as well, since the world was changing at lightning-fast pace. And any professional came with a work experience or even if not that, then at least talent and education. Well very sadly, no one had the time, money or energy to invest upon that. There was already a vast pool of geared-up ambitious aspirants and that seemed far more easy and simpler. ‘Easy way out’, is the buzzword.

Sonali had always been an ambitious person who wanted to create wonders in her profession. Ever since her school to her college to her profession she had always been one of the front-runners in her career. There were a few hits and few misses, but she had never imagined herself as a non-working person.

Like all other mothers, she gave priority to her motherhood over everything else and decided to stay with her parents for some time along with the baby. No one knew the definition of ‘some time’. It was funny, that having undergone through the same set of circumstances, how the professional arena was unwilling to comprehend the situation. She had to let go off her existing job.

Time flew between feeding, catching upon sleep, vaccinations and a lovely time with the baby. Very sadly, the baby’s father was the left one out here. Again, how was the professional world so cold to fathers. Didn’t fathers want to spend time with their babies?

And finally travel became the way of life, for all to be together. Sometimes it was Sonali while at other times it was her husband. They knew that this resolution could not work out for long. This was not a fool proof option. It survived a year. And now, there was even a career gap which very few would be willing to consider.

Sonali had no option but to join somewhere, and get back to her profession. Not because she was ready to work but simply so that an expiry date to her employability is not tagged along with the career gap. People were still willing to adjust to the term ‘maternity sabbatical’. But not many were willing to accept a career gap.

She undertook certifications, applied on openings and appeared for the interviews endlessly. After numerous discouraging and disheartening attempts, she finally managed to land herself into a job.

And online trainings, meetings and power point presentations became the order of the day. There were missed festivals, birthdays or other occasions in which either the father or the mother or both would be absent. There were many missed moments as well.....even like the baby’s first walk or first talk and many more. Video chats served as their savior. And more so, who gets such supportive parents completely willing to raise the child on their own. Sonali was lucky at least on this part! This decision was however more easily taken than implemented.

The only person who was completely unaware of all this despite being in the centre of the entire whirlwind was very cutely the child himself! Or maybe everyone thinks the child is unaware since we do not understand his language or his expressions or he is unable to express his feelings in the language that we can comprehend. Maybe, the child was completely aware and was as much in pain. No one could tell! Science had still got to decode that.

The baby could not distinguish between his family member or a visitor. His love was unconditional and uniform for all. Maybe that’s the way the Creator, wanted all of us to be. It was one evening that Sonali was just arranging a few clothes in her wardrobe while her son played on the bed with his toys. It was just a second when Sonali had turned away and the child fell on the floor from the bed. The entire family had heard the ‘thud’ and came rushing to her room. Her father immediately picked up his wailing grandchild while Sonali was still in shock. She realized that her baby had crawled till the edge of the bed and then fallen down. He did not know that there was a void beyond the edge and that he would fall to the floor. She now was doubly careful especially from fire, water or height.

The grandparents made regular visits but each time the parents separated from their baby the pain and the guilt aggravated even more. Especially with the baby-bond growing stronger per visit. There were busy weekdays but lonely weekends or evenings when the parents sulked or cursed themselves or the stars for such a situation. To change this, they would have cups of tea or coffee on Saturday or Sunday and chatted about their bygone week at their respective offices. To their surprise, they would run out of topics within half an hour. More importantly because it just did not hold as much importance and also because both were equally disinterested in those.

Shopping or Eating Out would not bring the joy like before and they would soon feel absolutely blank and deserted. They yearned for their son to be by their side. They realized that the baby was the joy of their life now! No outing or movie or anything else could replace the bliss of being with their child.

The grandparents were taking optimum care of the child in raising him up. They would visit the parents' home regularly: sometimes fortnightly, sometimes monthly depending on the leave convenience and holidays. Gradually, it started taking a toll in all arenas be it physical, emotional, mental or even financial. Both the parents and the baby travelled depending upon the situation but either took its toll. Leave apart the ageing grandparents, it was easier to raise a child than a grandchild. They were coping with their ailments too.

It was her child’s third year running and both parents were working; one for the continuity of their careers and the other for their salaries. And again, the baby was not with them! Both parents knew that this could not go on and they were determined to change it as well.

The separation was painful. And now, there was an even more excruciating difference from the initial situations. And that was, that the child was beginning to comprehend the fact that, the people who visited him or whom he visited regularly would be departing after some period of time. Maybe it would not have made much sense to him, but the bond had become strong enough that each time they separated it pricked the baby as well. Maybe, it might have hurt earlier as well, but he was never able to express that earlier. Now it had purely converted into wails and tears.

Yes! There were chocolates and toys and trips to deviate his attention, but now he had begun to feel the void of his parents’ absence The parents could sense the child's anguish when he would be unwilling to interact with them over the videoconferencing or a call. It seemed like he completely disowned them when they were distant and was all in hugs and kisses when they were physically present with him. These were contrasting reactions completely narrating his distinct story. His story of missing them badly.

And, it finally got converted to words, in no time……'Papa....mummy......please don't go!'. The child was finally able to express his feelings in the language that all understood. This penetrated deep into the everyone especially, the parents’ hearts.

They thought to themselves. ‘It was still fine to feel the pain of separation but to inflict the same to the baby was absolutely unfair.’ And completely disgraced parenthood. The child’s broken sentences started expressing themselves in different formats, on each separation. Sometime it would be......'Please don’t leave me' Then at others it would be.....'I want to go with you.' And definitely accompanied by those silent tearful eyes.

It had pierced the parents so hard that finally they put their foot down on the situation and decided....Enough was enough! They would not let time dominate over the situation and play its own game anymore. It was high time to take action!

The parents checked upon nannies and day-cares. Long time ago, parents could hand over their children to the nannies peacefully and move over for work only to delightfully meet their kids in the evening. Nannies were reliable. They would treat the kid like their own, feed them appropriately, lull them to sleep and do everything that was required to take care of the baby till the mother was back.

But times were different......it was the digital era. While technology was scaling new heights, humanity and goodness were touching new lows. And home-nannies were too much a risk to take for a child who would be at least for ten hours with her. 'Reliable' was a huge word and it spanned everything from products to humans.

There were 24-hour video-streaming day-cares but again it was completely upon the parents’ perception. Was it too early for leaving the baby for complete days at day-cares? Or was it OK? Well, leaving at the grandparents’ care sounded as a more reliable option. But the kid had grown, beginning to comprehend and able to mildly express. And also, the grandparents were ageing.

The only thing which was in favour of them was the kid's age. Now he was in a decent age to be conveniently registered into a preschool with the latter half of the day at a day-care. He could be involved in learning and creative activities and would hopefully be able to express himself of any inconvenience. And after a lot of evaluation of the pros and cons, they finally took the plunge.

They had to anyways part with their child.... be it at the day-care or at the grandparents’ town. Hence, they decided to give day-care a chance!

To everyone’s respite, the child finally moved in with his parents. The jigsaw puzzle was gradually beginning to fit into their places. The parents would drop him to a preschool with a day-care facility. It wasn’t easy to stay away from the kid but they had the liberty to hop in anytime and for any duration at that place. And a 24-hour-video-streaming was available at the day-care facility.

The most exciting time both for the child and them was when they came to pick him up. The child was the exquisite new joy of her life! After he was picked up in the evening, Sonali had a conversational query-list to verify whether or not he was appropriately taken care of. The child would react with nods and few words.

Now, for the guilty parents there was nothing happier than raising up a happy child. They had gradually taken over and endeavored in every way which could make the child happier and comfortable. It was funny to see moms fretting and fuming over naughty children at the children's park. But it’s very true one realizes the value of anyone when that person is away. The rest all was of second priority; be it the job or career or anything else.

The parents never realized when Rohan grew but he certainly looked grown from his earlier images or photographs. He once picked up an uncomfortable phrase from a neighbour. It was very difficult for mommy dear to get that off his tongue. That was how children begin to pick up language or behaviour. It’s the world and circumstances around a child which builds his personality and it is up to we grown-ups to give children the correct environment. All knew that for sure!

The parents’ excitement would however sober down since they had to take care of too many things simultaneously. There was not a second to think for anything else. From her pending work to changing his nappies. Off course! there were times which really got onto their nerves when he refused to sleep in the night or wailed during an office call. But all of that was temporary and all the irritation and anger would whiff away in one laughter of their son.

It was weekend and both Sonali and Rahul had decided to be at home since they had had a truly hectic week. To their pleasant surprise, it was full of fun! From interacting with the kid to playing with him to singing him a lullaby; all was a tiring but very fulfilling experience. This was nothing like their previous fun times. It was truly satisfying. They certainly had to give in to exhaustion and sleep beside the child. And when both woke up in the evening, the baby was still sleeping. This would recharge them completely. This was a new lease of life and an opportunity to live life again, beginning from childhood.

Life was offering to live all the years from childhood till date, yet again. Unlearning and then learning. It was up to them for any rectifications and living it optimally.

Maybe that was the reason the entire of mankind reproduced, to give new meaning and directions to their own life. Off course, there were people who were happy otherwise as well. However, this was a magical experience. Far from the wear and tear of daily life, far from the corporate success to career failures; it had the power to heal all. This was the true trophy. It just needed your love. And would love you back. Maybe this was God.

There was an enchanting power to have thought through and created life in all its innocence. You could pass through each phase of your life again. It even gave you a sense of déjà vu. Having a child in your life was like a rebirth or a chance of living again! It was magical!